You know what really grinds my gears?!

[Senor_Taylor]

"Client wishes for this bug to be fixed ASAP as they want to do XYZ."

The bug is just a feature we don't have and isn't even on the road map, the "fix" is to map out and implement entirely new functionality.

I'm with you there on talking to people who don't know the technical details, but at a certain point, that's just the name of the game?

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[ScottyB]

I'm with you there on talking to people who don't know the technical details, but at a certain point, that's just the name of the game?  

oh absolutely but there is a line between "i'd like to make XYZ edits to achieve this particular end" vs "just do whatever things you people do so its better and stop asking for my feedback".  one way is helpful and can fascilitate a plan of attack, the other is a complete waste of everyone's time.  that's all i meant.  i'm used to everything i touch being edited multiple times before it ever gets implemented on a final scale.

[Senor_Taylor]

Yeah, I wasn't trying to down play your point. Was just adding a little tangent there.

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[Apoc]

I've heard from Jake and Joey that "Add more Pop" is in a similar vein.

its exactly the same thing.  same with "just make it bigger"

low effort responses from non-designer people that are used to getting their way, can't be bothered, and expect to have their mind read.  the result is always the same in the end...garbage

I tell people at work that if their feedback includes the word "just," they are minimizing the effort involved and it's unlikely we'll ever be able to meet their expectations.

[JustinG]

Selling my LG watch Sport, posted at $200.

"I'll buy it right now for $160 if you ship today and it arrives by Saturday."

Why sure, I'll definitely do that.

People wouldn't do this if it didn't work right?

[Jake]

Y'all will love this one. My coworker runs our taxonomy - aka, tags applied to every piece of content which allows our search engine to work. She makes our Google happen. She is working on updating some tags for more accurate search results, and reached out to one of the leads of a particular site for his opinion. This was but two mere paragraphs of the reply she got, which featured tables, three font sizes, bold/underline, and green/yellow highlighting.

The trick with these is that they are, by dint of taking a *global* view of "Agile" (not just some *single* element of Agile), part of "project management methodology." That being said, I do *not* want to propose "agile" as a synonym for "project management methodology."

Is it technically feasible to build an "Agile methodology" tag that would take a global view of Agile *as* a methodology, but not necessarily pull in every single Agile resource? Or is it impossible to build a tag, unless I gave you a couple of synonyms? The reason that I ask: I couldn't tell you what synonyms to use. The selection of what is and what is not in scope is not so simple -- to my mind -- as selecting a couple of synonyms .... it's more of a judgment call about the "Gestalt" of the web asset -- i.e., I do not believe it is reducible to an aggregate of synonyms.

We stalked the guy on LinkedIn and under "activities" he's listed "nominated for Best Dissertation at Duke." What a nosebleed.

[.RJ]

As a sometimes "Agile" (cue dilbert comic) consultant/coach/practitioner.... I want to punch this guy in the throat.

[Senor_Taylor]

R/IAmVerySmart

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[Ken]

Y'all will love this one. My coworker runs our taxonomy - aka, tags applied to every piece of content which allows our search engine to work. She makes our Google happen. She is working on updating some tags for more accurate search results, and reached out to one of the leads of a particular site for his opinion. This was but two mere paragraphs of the reply she got, which featured tables, three font sizes, bold/underline, and green/yellow highlighting.

The trick with these is that they are, by dint of taking a *global* view of "Agile" (not just some *single* element of Agile), part of "project management methodology." That being said, I do *not* want to propose "agile" as a synonym for "project management methodology."

Is it technically feasible to build an "Agile methodology" tag that would take a global view of Agile *as* a methodology, but not necessarily pull in every single Agile resource? Or is it impossible to build a tag, unless I gave you a couple of synonyms? The reason that I ask: I couldn't tell you what synonyms to use. The selection of what is and what is not in scope is not so simple -- to my mind -- as selecting a couple of synonyms .... it's more of a judgment call about the "Gestalt" of the web asset -- i.e., I do not believe it is reducible to an aggregate of synonyms.

We stalked the guy on LinkedIn and under "activities" he's listed "nominated for Best Dissertation at Duke." What a nosebleed.

This post is not complete without picture. As of now, i'm basically imagining Donald Trump Jr.

[WRXtranceformed]

This is an actual email that a sales rep forwarded to me from a possible client (a well-known, large software company) he is working with, who wants to buy my group's stuff, responding to a statement of work we sent over. 

Hi (sales rep),

I spoke to our VP of (Big and Important Things), (Big and Important Man), and he's requesting that this data be a pilot, free of charge, and if this venture proves to be successful, (Big Important Business Group) and (Big Important Software Company) as a whole will consider sourcing data from you more frequently in the future.

Please let me know your thoughts and I will speak with our leadership ASAP.

Thank you and enjoy your weekend.

Sales rep wasn't sure how to respond, I told him that we respectfully decline.  Not a super strong negotiating tactic to ask us to do a huge project at no cost for the possibility of maybe doing business with us in the future.  

Really, your company had double digit billions of revenue last quarter and you can't break off a few thousand to pay a world-class team to do work for you?  Hrm alright 

Or, if your specific group is poor / underfunded, you could just say so instead of trying to coax pro bono work out of us

[Apoc]

I've done that actual thing and been successful. 

[JPolen01]

Dude you need to get that rep into some additional training. The fact that he was unsure of how to answer that email worries me.

[WRXtranceformed]

I've done that actual thing and been successful. 

Ha good on you man.  Out of curiousity, did you actually buy something from them after that?

Our group is not hard up for work from customers who have no problem paying us and next year is not looking any different.

[Apoc]

Actually, I was wrong. Thinking back, I negotiated a $125k contract down to their labor cost of $8k.

We didn't buy anything after that, but our team's charter moved away from people analytics to more of an operations analytics focus.

We did the pilot in good faith and I had a good working relationship with their CEO, so I don't feel like we purposefully hosed them. Not all biz dev pans out...

[WRXtranceformed]

Actually, I was wrong. Thinking back, I negotiated a $125k contract down to their labor cost of $8k.

We didn't buy anything after that, but our team's charter moved away from people analytics to more of an operations analytics focus.

We did the pilot in good faith and I had a good working relationship with their CEO, so I don't feel like we purposefully hosed them. Not all biz dev pans out...

And that's why I don't do projects for free or severely reduced cost.  I learned that lesson a long time ago. Even if it's done in good faith, I can't control what direction other peoples' business focus or budget takes in the future.  There is no benefit for me to bank on the hope of something big in the future when we have clients paying us what we are worth AND coming back with big software and project renewals.

Like Polen kind of alluded to though, that's sales / biz dev 101.  They got outmaneuvered by you, so that's on them.

[Apoc]

I guess... but we also brought them in house a few times and gave them all the ways they needed to change to product for it to appeal to Amazon, so it wasn't without its benefits. That doesn't mean much if you have a mature product, but what they were selling was only a few years old and they needed the help.

[WRXtranceformed]

I guess... but we also brought them in house a few times and gave them all the ways they needed to change to product for it to appeal to Amazon, so it wasn't without its benefits. That doesn't mean much if you have a mature product, but what they were selling was only a few years old and they needed the help.

Also doesn't mean much if Amazon doesn't buy it 

[JPolen01]

I get those people every day. Well I have 15 possible projects next year so give me a huge discount now and I'll use you on the next ones. Well sir you are bidding 15 projects next year. You might win 3 of them and I'll never hear from you again. Pound sand my friend.

[Apoc]

I guess... but we also brought them in house a few times and gave them all the ways they needed to change to product for it to appeal to Amazon, so it wasn't without its benefits. That doesn't mean much if you have a mature product, but what they were selling was only a few years old and they needed the help.

Also doesn't mean much if Amazon doesn't buy it 

It's a company of 500k people. Gotta play the long game.

[WRXtranceformed]

I guess... but we also brought them in house a few times and gave them all the ways they needed to change to product for it to appeal to Amazon, so it wasn't without its benefits. That doesn't mean much if you have a mature product, but what they were selling was only a few years old and they needed the help.

Also doesn't mean much if Amazon doesn't buy it 

It's a company of 500k people. Gotta play the long game.

That's how they try to get ya!

"Get rich or die trying son!"