You know what really grinds my gears?!

[JPolen01]

LOL I had a feeling this was you when Rex asked me about the cameras. I hate em as much as you, but they are clearly marked almost everywhere and you have to be doing 12+ over the limit to get popped. Pay it and move on.

Montgomery County?

[davej]

Yeah, some country road on the way back to dc after picking up some wheels. I was feeling good about my 45 in a 40, nothing crazy in state car. I'm sure I lifted of the gas after the 30 sign, but didn't stand on the brakes to immediately reduce my speed at the one 30 sign.

I already paid it, but damnit, I'm going to take a leak on the side of the road next time I'm in your state.

[JPolen01]

Fair enough. They do make you slam on the brakes almost immediately. It causes some wonderful traffic for a mile and then everyone hammers the gas again. Complete cash grab.

[WRXtranceformed]

When a business leader is a total CVNT to you the several times you asked for a meeting after demonstrating measurable success with their company and wanted to take it to the next level...and then a few years later direct messages you on LinkedIn and asks if you will buy their new book. Uh yeah sorry chief HR lunch lady, that's going to be a hard pass

Then on the other end of the business spectrum: business leader who I interacted with casually when they were clients of ours but had a good relationship with messages me to tell me that she has a new business. She wants to network and explore biz opportunities. ABSOLUTELY! I totally have time for you. Funny how that works. Moral of the story: don't be a CVNT to people in the business world maybe unless they are deserving

[Senor_Taylor]

Re: speed camera

Speed limit signs indicate you need to be at that speed when you pass them, so it shouldn't matter how far back the camera is from the sign.

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CVNT is my company and I was really confused for a second there.

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[davej]

Re: speed camera

Speed limit signs indicate you need to be at that speed when you pass them, so it shouldn't matter how far back the camera is from the sign.

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CVNT is my company and I was really confused for a second there.

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Re: Taylor and your logic/knowledge of the law

[Sully]

Verizon.

FiOS.

Wireless.

The entire company.

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[ScottyB]

this is all the same client.  she's driving me out of my freakin skull. one of these super image-conscious pseudo-high-powered early 40's women that i have to deal with because i'm contracted on a job for a photographer i need to keep around. otherwise i would have walked from this weeks ago.

client: i need this by Friday, this is super important, they told me you can turn this around fast i hope they're right rawr rawr rawr
me: you got it *proceeds to bust ass to build out multiple drafts, turn around edits within an hour, take absurd phone calls*, here's the final draft all i need is your approval and you're done
client: *crickets for 3 weeks*
client: oh hey i'm back, i was busy doing important businessing.  its perfect.
me: great
client: oh except for these 8 things
me: son of a bitch


client: i need all this on there (wall of text on a nice, open photo) but make it look clean
me: its crowded now but this is as good as its gonna get, lets not change this much because reasons and cost
client: this is too crowded
me: no shit *fixes it and it looks passable as good work again*
client: i like that you made the things smaller but also can you make them bigger
me: stahp


me: here is the graphic everything was arranged very carefully we don't have a millimeter to spare, i can't stress enough we don't have any more space without rebuilding the entire shot
client: whoops i forgot to send you our NEW corporate graphic that's twice as big can you please put it in the same tiny space but make it bigger
me: no
client: also need this ASAP
me: die ASAP


client: i can't read all the things
me: look at all the crap you want on here, if you want them legible its going to make the picture impossible to see
client: OK just make it a little bigger oh and here's more content i want 
me: fine, here, now it looks like garbage
client: i love it
me: i hate you

[Jake]

"I love it"

"I hate you"

I feel like this is everyone's work life summed up in six words, but especially yours.

[Sijray21]

I lol'd at your expense, thanks Scotty

[JPolen01]

I lol'd at your expense, thanks Scotty

x2. Do we have the same customers? 

"I need this delivered on the 25th"

"Perfect. We have about a week lead time so send me the signed agreement by tomorrow and we will be all set."

Over a week goes by with no response from customer and ignored voicemails/emails. On the 23rd I will receive an email with the agreement - "here you go. Please let me know what time this will be here on the 25th"

Well, we have a week lead time and you just completed the paperwork. Shitstorm ensues.

[Ken]

I lol'd at your expense, thanks Scotty

x2. Do we have the same customers? 

"I need this delivered on the 25th"

"Perfect. We have about a week lead time so send me the signed agreement by tomorrow and we will be all set."

Over a week goes by with no response from customer and ignored voicemails/emails. On the 23rd I will receive an email with the agreement - "here you go. Please let me know what time this will be here on the 25th"

Well, we have a week lead time and you just completed the paperwork. Shitstorm ensues.

Ugh, yes this.

"you mean, you didn't start the order?"

"considering we didn't have an order or even at least a letter of intent, no."

[ScottyB]

I lol'd at your expense, thanks Scotty

i'm glad SOMEBODY'S laughing around here, as i lay crying on the floor in the fetal position

"Please let me know what time this will be here on the 25th"

we do have the same clients - i think the formal term is "ThunderCunts". informally they are ass-kissing yes-people who are used to throwing their weight around to get what they want.

i have to tell you though. there are times....rare times...when i control the deal either through having what they want or them being beholden to a contract, and they feed me that line you quoted...

...and i just calmly tell them that Their Precious will arrive 5 days later than they expect, as per discussed and signed, and to please let me know if the shipment arrives in good shape. then i lean back in my chair, gaze out the window and savor the silence on the other line.

[.RJ]

...and i just calmly tell them that Their Precious will arrive 5 days later than they expect, as per discussed and signed, and to please let me know if the shipment arrives in good shape.  then i lean back in my chair, gaze out the window and savor the silence on the other line.

[Sully]

I lol'd at your expense, thanks Scotty

i'm glad SOMEBODY'S laughing around here, as i lay crying on the floor in the fetal position

"Please let me know what time this will be here on the 25th"

we do have the same clients - i think the formal term is "ThunderCunts". informally they are ass-kissing yes-people who are used to throwing their weight around to get what they want.

i have to tell you though. there are times....rare times...when i control the deal either through having what they want or them being beholden to a contract, and they feed me that line you quoted...

...and i just calmly tell them that Their Precious will arrive 5 days later than they expect, as per discussed and signed, and to please let me know if the shipment arrives in good shape. then i lean back in my chair, gaze out the window and savor the silence on the other line.

Just imaging the kermit the frog meme

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[Evan]

Dear all of the DC metro area, especially Maryland:

[ScottyB]

assholes

my favorite thing is when you don't let them in, and they look at you like, "why would you do that, you jerk?"

[Sijray21]

assholes

my favorite thing is when you don't let them in, and they look at you like, "why would you do that, you jerk?"

Haha, yes. I was proud of the 8-10 cars ahead of me who also didn't let in an asshole who did this one time a few weeks ago.

[G.Irish]

On an on ramp I don't mind someone driving up to merge as long as they aren't an ass about it. For a left turn like the picture I'm definitely not letting someone in who's shamelessly trying to cut. Sometimes makes me wish I still had a truck to intimidate fools into backing down.

[Sijray21]

Sometimes makes me wish I still had a truck to intimidate fools into backing down.

Having an older car that you don't care about too much helps.