I'm a Survivor

[ViPER1313]

I don't know whether it's due to watching too much RCR, reading a lot of Jalopnik, or a brain tumor, but I enjoy looking for once mainstream survivor cars, mainly from the 80s and 90s, that are the opposite of cool. These are the cars that no enthusiast would ever give a second glance. These are cars your Aunt bought, drove her kids around in, ran into the ground and sold to a dealer for $100. They were never meant to be held on to, cared for, or loved, but occasionally one slips through the cracks. Finding them is surprisingly difficult. It is harder to find a clean 1st generation Plymouth Voyager than a Model T Ford.

Is anyone interested in starting a weekly challenge to find the cleanest example of a super terrible car? The finder of the best terrible car example picks the next challenge. No price limits. No cool cars. Cars should preferably be 1970+ that sold in the many thousands of units but are almost extinct. Some examples off the top of my head are the X2 Hyundai Excel, 1st and 2nd Generation Dodge Caravan/Plymouth Voyager, Geo Storm, Eagle anything non-Talon, Dodge Shadow, and Chevrolet Lumina APV . Posted examples should strive for originality, low mileage and cleanliness.

If so, week one's challenge is the Ford Tempo / Mercury Topaz (inspired by this week's Jalopnik article, found here - http://jalopnik.com/meh-car-monday-of-co...1795027786). Bonus points are given for the Mercury Topaz GS V6 with a 5-speed manual.

Here is one such example of a clean Ford Tempo, clocking in with only 17k miles:

https://washingtondc.craigslist.org/nva/...48958.html

[Senor_Taylor]

The is a really interesting idea. The first challenge strikes close to home because I left an orange crayon in the back seat of my mom's Tempo when I was 5 and it melted. I felt so bad :/

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[Apoc]

The first challenge strikes close to home because I left an orange crayon in the back seat of my mom's Tempo when I was 5 and it melted. I felt so bad :/

My wife asked what I was laughing at.

[BLINGMW]

+1 on interesting idea. For mom. Not for me.

[EclipseTurbno93]

Here's the best I could find, the interior is to die for,
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://eugene.craigslist.org/cto/6089379676.html">https://eugene.craigslist.org/cto/6089379676.html</a><!-- m -->

[ScottyB]

friend of mine in high school had a tempo. he started it up to leave school one day and when he turned the heater on it shot flames out of the dashboard vents and then promptly burned to the ground. i think it literally couldn't tolerate its own existence anymore.

[Jake]

friend of mine in high school had a tempo. he started it up to leave school one day and when he turned the heater on it shot flames out of the dashboard vents and then promptly burned to the ground. i think it literally couldn't tolerate its own existence anymore.

Haaaah. That's amazing.

Adam, I love this idea. Not sure anyone will find a better Tempo than the blue one you posted but I'll give it a shot.

[davej]

This is my new favorite game, Adam. Nicely done!

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://www.ebay.com/itm/302308175899">http://www.ebay.com/itm/302308175899</a><!-- m --> at 33k miles, it's no blue one but I'm going to give it an extra point for having all the rubber bits replaced, although I'm also deducting one for a dirty floor mat.

[SlimKlim]

Adam, I love this idea. Not sure anyone will find a better Tempo than the blue one you posted but I'll give it a shot.

I just came here to say that Jake will be on this game like a fat kid on cake.

[ViPER1313]

My aunt used to have a Tempo; it was as terrible and green as you can imagine. 2 interesting facts - the car had a non SRS rated airbag it was so poorly made, and the horn was on a small indicator stalk.

[ScottyB]

Bonus points are given for the Mercury Topaz GS V6 with a 5-speed manual.

what do i get for a beat-ass 4cyl 5 speed 2 door toapz with a trunk rack?

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://limaohio.craigslist.org/cto/6120657191.html">https://limaohio.craigslist.org/cto/6120657191.html</a><!-- m -->


for the less disconcerting connoisseur, a similar tempo model, but with a rad pinstripe. bet that was factory, bro.
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://harrisburg.craigslist.org/cto/6117490024.html">https://harrisburg.craigslist.org/cto/6117490024.html</a><!-- m -->


i've found the trick to finding these is to look in impoverished great lakes rust belt states :lol: the deep south doesn't seem to work because people are still driving them

[ViPER1313]

<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://i.imgur.com/1HWQIPa.gifv">https://i.imgur.com/1HWQIPa.gifv</a><!-- m -->

[SlimKlim]

^ Does your boyfriend often tickle you to within an inch of your life?

[ViPER1313]

I may have failed at Imgur.

[.RJ]

There's a little truth in every joke

[SlimKlim]

This is why i love MM

[EclipseTurbno93]

So what's up next?

[davej]

I'm going to vote for a K car, and not some fancy LeBaron Turbo nonsense. Give me a clean Aunt Mabel's sedan with that plush interior.

[CaptainHenreh]

So what's up next?

Chrysler TC by Maserati.

[ViPER1313]

It is a Lebaron but this deserves a nomination <!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="https://plattsburgh.craigslist.org/cto/6079105502.html">https://plattsburgh.craigslist.org/cto/6079105502.html</a><!-- m -->