Meddling family members
#1
So I just had an interesting conversation with my mom. She called me tonight, asking me not to ride up to NoVA this weekend. Something about how one of her sister's friends got killed one time on a motorcycle.

So I just wanted to see how supportive your family has (or hasn't) been to your motorcycling... Any advice for dealing with it? Its a first for me, for the most part my parents have been extremely supportive of all my dangerous hobbies - this is really the first time they've gone this direction...
My two feet.
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#2
if this is the first time....just let it blow over. subconsciously, they'll always fear for you but if you are worried about what they're thinking than just heed their warnings from time to time until it blows over. there will always be bike accidents until bikes dissapear forever.

i have enough trouble trying to justify the reasons why i want a fast car to my family, let alone reasons for owning a 2 wheeled rocket.
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2019 4Runner TRD Off-Road
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Past:  03 Xterra SE 4x4  |  05 Impreza 2.5RS  |  99.5 A4 Quattro 1.8T  |  01 Accord EX  |  90 Maxima GXE  |  96 Explorer XLT
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#3
I havent even told my mother......

Every time I bring it up she gets angry.
(09-25-2019, 03:18 PM)V1GiLaNtE Wrote: I think you need to see a mental health professional.
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#4
john, was the death recent? i know of a friend of the family who was killed on his bike this past weekend.
I Am Mike
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2 wheels: '12 Surly Cross-Check Custom | '14 Trek Madone 2.1 105 | '17 Norco Threshold SL Force 1 | '17 Norco Revolver 9.2 FS | '18 BMC Roadmachine 02 Two | '19 Norco Search XR Steel (Formerly '97 Honda VFR750F, '05 Giant TCR 2, '15 WeThePeople Atlas 24, '10 Scott Scale 29er XT, '11 Cervelo R3 Rival, '12 Ridley X-Fire Red)

No longer onyachin.
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#5
Mom - nope, no support. Cut off completely because of it, actually.

Dad.. well, he can't say anything, he's been riding since he was 13.

She'll never totally get over it, but she'll get used to it... it's in a mother's nature. I find it's best to just leave the subject alone... you know?
When it comes to Ryan Jenkins, the story ends with me putting him in the wall.

2009 Speed Triple | 2006 DR-Z400SM | 1999 CBR600F4 | 1998 Jeep Cherokee

-Ginger
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#6
Mike Wrote:john, was the death recent?

I believe so. Not sure on the exact timeline...
My two feet.
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#7
JohnC Wrote:
Mike Wrote:john, was the death recent?

I believe so. Not sure on the exact timeline...

guy in his early 60s? WV?
I Am Mike
4 wheels:  '01 RAV4 (Formerly '93 Civic CX, '01 S2000, '10 GTI, '09 A4 Avant)
2 wheels: '12 Surly Cross-Check Custom | '14 Trek Madone 2.1 105 | '17 Norco Threshold SL Force 1 | '17 Norco Revolver 9.2 FS | '18 BMC Roadmachine 02 Two | '19 Norco Search XR Steel (Formerly '97 Honda VFR750F, '05 Giant TCR 2, '15 WeThePeople Atlas 24, '10 Scott Scale 29er XT, '11 Cervelo R3 Rival, '12 Ridley X-Fire Red)

No longer onyachin.
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#8
WV? was he from there or from NoVa, but riding in WV?

ugh....i have some creepy memories of bike accidents, but i'll save those for another story.
2010 Civic Si
2019 4Runner TRD Off-Road
--------------------------
Past:  03 Xterra SE 4x4  |  05 Impreza 2.5RS  |  99.5 A4 Quattro 1.8T  |  01 Accord EX  |  90 Maxima GXE  |  96 Explorer XLT
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#9
My parents have always left me largely to my own devices as far as decisions and responsibility go. With motorcycles neither one of them has ever even really raised an eyebrow about it.

As far as your parents I would bring up the statistics and talk to them realistically about the odds and how you are actively reducing the odds that you'll get hurt.
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Past: 2018 Honda Civic Type-R, 2015 Yamaha R1, 2009 BMW M3, 2013 Aprilia RSV4R, 2006 Honda Ridgeline, 2006 Porsche Cayman S, 2012 Ducati 1199, 2009 Subaru WRX, 2008 CBR1000RR, 2009 Kawasaki ZX-6R, 2000 Toyota Tundra, 2005 Honda CBR600RR, 1996 Acura Integra GS-R, 1996 Acura Integra GS-R, 1997 Honda Civic EX

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#10
Mike Wrote:
JohnC Wrote:
Mike Wrote:john, was the death recent?

I believe so. Not sure on the exact timeline...

guy in his early 60s? WV?

Louisiana.
My two feet.
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#11
lets see, rode for 5 years before the parents found out. just kept the bike at jmu/my buddies house. Easier than I thought.

tell the parents how seriously you take it, tell em you've read every book/webside about motorcycle safety ever written.

my mamas supportive about me stunting in parking lots twice a week but hates me riding on the street once a month, which is realistic cuz the trip to Food Lion is what kills you Sad not the circle wheelie
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#12
It's an uphill battle. Fortunately, I took the MSC WITH my parents, and then they got 2 bikes on which I rode until I got my first bike at 17. That being said, I didn't immediately tell them about my F4i.

I could tell you to tell them that "it makes you a more alert driver overall" and to reference the stats, but it is not going to help. I'd be worried sick about my son/daughter if he/she was out on their own riding a motorcycle.

My best advice is to just ride very carefully and let your own stats speak for themselves. 2 years go by, 10000 miles, and no accidents, it will help a little (but not much).

I guess it's just going to be one of those things. Sorry...
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#13
my mom's a weird one. She actually came with me to DC to check the bike out and watched me ride home while she was behind me. I told her that i've never ridden on the street before....

...after she saw me ride it home her heart warmed up to the idea. She knows that i won't do anything stupid on the bike, but like everyone else she knows that most of the accidents involving bikes aren't their fault. She's concerned, but she told me that when i get a bigger bike i have to take her for a ride, lol.

Luckily my family has been both supportive and against it. For the most part the supportive members have calmed the one's against the idea. My cousin (35 with kids) just got his license after the MSF and just bought an R1. Granted that's definitely not the ideal bike for a first bike, i have no doubt he can handle it and he won't risk his life for his kids'. My other cousins in the Philippines have also ridden many bikes (mostly dual purpose) and they've also been supportive and stressed the use of the eyes and being defensive AND NOT to be afraid to hit the throttle incase of imminent danger.

this is something you want, but they're obviously concerned. My mom and i both have a kind of mentality where have fun with your life - you only have one. Obviously she's concerned about me riding, but knows that i really want to and that i'll be as careful as i can regarding the street. She even promoted that i track the bike! (...and not ride on the street, but that's another conversation)
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#14
theguywiththeSi Wrote:She even promoted that i track the bike! (...and not ride on the street, but that's another conversation)

That might be where I end up next year Smile
(09-25-2019, 03:18 PM)V1GiLaNtE Wrote: I think you need to see a mental health professional.
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#15
.RJ Wrote:
theguywiththeSi Wrote:She even promoted that i track the bike! (...and not ride on the street, but that's another conversation)

That might be where I end up next year Smile


Hahaha, "might"
When it comes to Ryan Jenkins, the story ends with me putting him in the wall.

2009 Speed Triple | 2006 DR-Z400SM | 1999 CBR600F4 | 1998 Jeep Cherokee

-Ginger
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#16
My parents were completely against it, but my dad wavered a tad, provided me his truck to go get it. He said he would even give me $1000 if I didn't get a bike, well I lost out there. Eventually they were fine after I came back from a number of short rides and nothing had happened. I didn't ride much cause it made them nervous and my mom was worried about me. John you are completely independent so I think it will probably be easier for your parents to be cool with it. I have to move out first before I get another bike.
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#17
My parents hate it. My mom won't talk about it. She just tells me to sell it. So I just to talk about it around them and all is well. The messed up part is they both had bike when they where younger.

-Justin
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#18
mrbaggio Wrote:My parents hate it. My mom won't talk about it. She just tells me to sell it. So I just to talk about it around them and all is well. The messed up part is they both had bike when they where younger.

-Justin

what a double standard....a crock of sh!t
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#19
Both my parents ride...ive ridden with them since i was 4 years old or so. I got a 100cc dirtbike when I was about 7. Only thing they insisted on was Motorcycle Safety Course. I dont even have a bike yet, but mom lets me ride hers....lucky I guess
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#20
my parents just tell me to be careful - my mom would rather me track it than ride on the street.

my family knows there's no way I can get rid of it cuase i love it so much - so they deal with it
-Paul

"If you can't dazzle em with brilliance, baffle em with bullshit"
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