I need a new tow pig. Help.

[Jake]

Ford is repurchasing my 2018 F-150 due to some various items they cannot seem to fix. <--- that is the most polite and diplomatic way to describe the 54 days out of service with no resolution that I've dealt with

I need a new tow pig as I've stopped driving the Ford, effective immediately. They are buying it back with the current odometer reading, so anything past that will affect the monetary amount I get back. Plus, risk of crashes and so on. I've had some thoughts while driving press cars and I'm at a bit of a loss. Maybe talking it all out will help some.

The deal is this, I don't want any sort of payment neeeear what I was making on the new/nice/expensive truck. Anything brand new is out, as I'd rather put that kind of monthly payment into savings or travel or literally anything that's not a vehicle with a hitch. If we were talking 911s or F-Types then let 'er eat and I can retire never instead.

Before we get into my ideas, some other basic notes. No GMs, of course. I'd look at 09ish Tundras (pre-facelift) but godDAMN they are ugly trucks, sorry Kaan. I don't particularly like the facelift either, I liked it more when it was free and Toyota owned it. Second-gen (08+) Sequoia is out for the same reason. I could do a third Ford, pre-2018, with whatever engine I choose. I like them, they are reliable, etc. but part of me just wants to try something else. It's been 4 years of hearing doodeedoo every time I start my truck.

So, some ideas with some details:

2015ish Ram 1500 Laramie or Sport
I like these. They look good, the 5.7 V8 sounds great, and reliability seems par for the course. Ignore Brandon's Jeep. Could probably be purchased for $25-29k.



2015ish Ford Expedition Limited
This would be... an option. 3.5L EcoBoost. Same price as the Ram above. Slightly shorter overall. 119" wheelbase should be stable with the trailer given the '19 Sequoia I just had was 122" and hauled it a-ok.



2012ish Nissan Titan Pro 4X
This is my sub-$20k idea. They look pretty good. My friend is a master tech at Infiniti and says they'll go forever if you just change the oil. Kinda hard to find in this trim (but you get leather seats, which make the truck look way nicer) but I'd also consider the top-trim SL. 



2014ish Mercedes-Benz GL550
Wildcard. Same 122" wheelbase as the Sequoia. Pricing would be higher - $29-37k depending on mileage. I've driven one (and the slower GL450 sister) and they are nice inside. Super light steering. Lots of people on Benzworld and other forums seem to tow huge enclosed car trailers and campers with these. Reliability sounds pretty good.



2003ish Ford Excursion
Fuck it, maybe I should buy a school bus based on an F250. It'd be cheap but not cheerful given they like to eat balljoints and had sloppy steering from day one. But it would have charm, maybe? Diesel or V10 or whatever. Maybe I would hate this idea.



Thoughts? Am I missing anything?