Electile Dysfunction (Current students plz look!)

[Apoc]

And that fucking massage parlor only had 2 stars on Yelp:

Not that I look... okay I look... but like every adult oriented establishment (read: strip clubs) have ~2 star ratings.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-selection_bias

I love that data analyst in you, never change.

That makes me want to go on a Yelp binge to read what people bitch about at adult establishments.   'Turns out that hole in the wall was not meant for me - 2 stars'  'Squirted chocolate syrup on me, but then just left me there, covered in syrup - 3 stars' 'She left a shit stain on my pants - 1 star'

Whenever I go to new cities, I always yelp the strip clubs. No shame in my game.

People who review them fall into these general categories:

1) Brosephs who complain they aren't let is because they have fashionably torn jeans, even when they're wearing a $5000 watch
2) Wives/girlfriends who talk about how hot the women are and how they loved buying a lap dance for their man
3) People who have someone in their party kicked out because they're too drunk and/or handsy
4) Guys who say they "never go to strip clubs and definitely don't write reviews" but were dragged there by coworkers on a business trip
5) Strippers, who were spurned in some way, talking about how turrible the management is