09-15-2010, 09:58 PM
Marriage: Tires and Purses
Wifey: There are two big, fat tires sitting in our driveway that the Fedex fairy just delivered. I'm headed to Lantz Pharmacy to meet with the Vera Bradley fairy.
Wifey: Didn't get a reply so I think I sent it to the wrong Steven Cannata,maybe a stunt double???
Me: Must be to pull a stunt like that!
Wifey: Haha funny man! Are they for Verona? How much Vera money do I get???
Wifey: No answer = no limit. Yahooo!!!!!
Wifey: In all seriousness, should I cancel my haircut and plan on getting Michael? You seem to be in the thick of that proposal. I can hit up Lantz on my way home.
Me: No need I'll get him. There is a lull coming, waiting for a sub response.
Wifey: Oh... you have enough time to leave early to get your son, just not enough time to "talk" to your wife. OK, got it.
Me: You have to sell your old purses first
Wifey: ... I just went in AND around our house - SEVENTEEN tires, none on cars!!!! No deal.
Wifey: I win! Again!
Me: Go count purses now.
Wifey: You SO lose!!! Not counting the "tire" on the "car", SEVEN!!! I even counted the one that's in the bench of the bay window!!
Me: So let's do the math, a car requires 4 tires so 17/4 = 4.25 A person requires one purse 7/1 = 7. 7x4 = 28, I will be buying 11 more tires!!! WIIIIINNNNNAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!!
Wifey: Additionally, there are four seasons in a year, each season demanding a different purse style. I typically wear only black & brown shoes, thereby demanding two shades of purses.Using my husband's car math, I need 8 seasonal purses, I have four places to hang them, thereby NEEDING 32 purses. I'm understocked - whew, I'm going to be busy!!!
Me: Wrong, how many it's possible to carry is irrelevant, only what is required can be used. A car requires 4 tires. And now that you mention it, I can't use R-comps when it's cold or raining so back to my math.... Oh crap, excel said it can't handle a number that big. Emergency tire shortage at the Cannata house!!
Wifey: I DON'T like your ridiculous math and I AM going shopping!! Yes, that was a temper tantrum! That's what you get for giving me no attention today!!
Me: Have you taken my tires to be mounted yet?
Wifey: No - your ass isn't home yet. No place to mount them up into...
Wifey: There are two big, fat tires sitting in our driveway that the Fedex fairy just delivered. I'm headed to Lantz Pharmacy to meet with the Vera Bradley fairy.
Wifey: Didn't get a reply so I think I sent it to the wrong Steven Cannata,maybe a stunt double???
Me: Must be to pull a stunt like that!
Wifey: Haha funny man! Are they for Verona? How much Vera money do I get???
Wifey: No answer = no limit. Yahooo!!!!!
Wifey: In all seriousness, should I cancel my haircut and plan on getting Michael? You seem to be in the thick of that proposal. I can hit up Lantz on my way home.
Me: No need I'll get him. There is a lull coming, waiting for a sub response.
Wifey: Oh... you have enough time to leave early to get your son, just not enough time to "talk" to your wife. OK, got it.
Me: You have to sell your old purses first
Wifey: ... I just went in AND around our house - SEVENTEEN tires, none on cars!!!! No deal.
Wifey: I win! Again!
Me: Go count purses now.
Wifey: You SO lose!!! Not counting the "tire" on the "car", SEVEN!!! I even counted the one that's in the bench of the bay window!!
Me: So let's do the math, a car requires 4 tires so 17/4 = 4.25 A person requires one purse 7/1 = 7. 7x4 = 28, I will be buying 11 more tires!!! WIIIIINNNNNAAAARRRRRR!!!!!!!!
Wifey: Additionally, there are four seasons in a year, each season demanding a different purse style. I typically wear only black & brown shoes, thereby demanding two shades of purses.Using my husband's car math, I need 8 seasonal purses, I have four places to hang them, thereby NEEDING 32 purses. I'm understocked - whew, I'm going to be busy!!!
Me: Wrong, how many it's possible to carry is irrelevant, only what is required can be used. A car requires 4 tires. And now that you mention it, I can't use R-comps when it's cold or raining so back to my math.... Oh crap, excel said it can't handle a number that big. Emergency tire shortage at the Cannata house!!
Wifey: I DON'T like your ridiculous math and I AM going shopping!! Yes, that was a temper tantrum! That's what you get for giving me no attention today!!
Me: Have you taken my tires to be mounted yet?
Wifey: No - your ass isn't home yet. No place to mount them up into...
Current: 1985 LS1 Corvette | 2014 328i Wagon F31
Former: 2010 Ford Edge | 1999 Integra GS
I have a little bit of a rub near lock but if you are turned to lock on a track there are other problems already...
Former: 2010 Ford Edge | 1999 Integra GS
I have a little bit of a rub near lock but if you are turned to lock on a track there are other problems already...