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+--- Thread: Apologizing for the sake of it? (/showthread.php?tid=5907)
Apologizing for the sake of it? - Apoc - 05-03-2007
So I'm having a bit of a cold war with a family member. This person thought I was disrespectful in an off-the-cuff comment I made in jest (me, say something inappropriate? no chance!). It wasn't crude or anything, it was just "You suck" in response to a complaint of "This sucks" about something a bunch of us was watching on TV.
After the fact I explained that I said it in jest and that it shouldn't be taken seriously. Thinking it was over I'd forgotten the incident until today, when the person in question told me they are still owed an apology... as I found out today. I don't really feel sorry for saying it, but I do feel bad that I hurt the persons feelings.
Maybe it's just a shell game but I have a problem with apologizing for something I don't feel sorry for doing. I could say I'm sorry they took it the wrong way but that's kinda like saying "I'm sorry you're so sensitive, grow some balls." The thing is, I think they are in fact being too sensitive.
The question is, do I stop being stubborn and just say I'm sorry for the sake of moving on or do I tell them what I really think? The obvious easy answer is just to apologize but I'm curious what others' opinions are.
- Mike - 05-03-2007
Losing touch with family is a bad thing... Swallowing your pride and reason for a minute is sometimes worth it.
- CaptainHenreh - 05-03-2007
Mike Wrote:Losing touch with family is a bad thing... Swallowing your pride and reason for a minute is sometimes worth it.
On the other hand, Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.
- HAULN-SS - 05-03-2007
Some guys Wrote:You should be like Robert E. Lee in admitting defeat. Dignified.
No vinegary words or multiple meanings to your wording. Just straightforward surrender. You cannot assail that kind of surrender and keep a respectable standing.
For them to win, it is no longer a pride. For you to lose, it is no longer a shame.
- Mike - 05-03-2007
CaptainHenreh Wrote:Mike Wrote:Losing touch with family is a bad thing... Swallowing your pride and reason for a minute is sometimes worth it.
On the other hand, Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke.
obviously, but it's best to keep that to yourself and display that you don't care.
- ScottyB - 05-03-2007
i wouldn't let it go. if it was just a friend things would be different.
- WRXtranceformed - 05-03-2007
You should tell that person that you're mad at them for asking for an apology, and that they owe you an apology for making you seem like a dick.
In all seriousness, does this person happen to be female? I know females don't typically ever let something like that go when it bothers them, so you may as well just suck it up and apologize or you'll never hear the end of it.
- Apoc - 05-03-2007
Female, yes. To be quite honest, I want to tell them their behavior that prompted my comment was rude but that will probably just send us farther down the rabbit hole.
- WRXtranceformed - 05-03-2007
You and I think alike my friend. Some people, guy or girl, are just drama queens and can't think or see outside of the center of their own little world. Like Scott said, if it was a friend or acquaintance, I'd probably just blow it off, but since it's a relative I'd apologize. Give her a warning though that it's very possible you'll say something similar again in the future and that she should try to be a big girl and not take it so personally.
- Feersty - 05-03-2007
Be the bigger person, Chris. I would think she would know your personality at this point, but never the less, apologize and move on.
- Apoc - 05-03-2007
That's the thing... everyone that knows me, and most that know me from the internet, know I'm prone to give people a hard time or joke around. I'm not saying that's license for me to be an asshole, but this was definitely not out of pattern and she knows that. Eh well... I'll probably just apologize to move on.
- ScottyB - 05-03-2007
i'd blame PMS
- Sijray21 - 05-04-2007
just apologize for making her feel bad, but don't apologize for the comment
she's too sensitive...